Micah is slowly entering the "boy" stage. The REAL boy stage. Where he tries to connect with Daddy every chance he gets, and disconnect from mom every chance he gets. I don't mean that he doesn't want me around. It's just that, things that used to make him adore me, he now loathes. Such as: bragging about him to people, getting down on one knee to embrace when I pick him up from school, and being silly in public (like skipping through Sam's club singing "Lions and tigers and bears, oh-my!")
Oh my. I'm not ready for this. I'm struggling to find new ways to connect with him. Teaching him at home helps. Because it gives us a "shared interest." We can study science or social studies and talk about his ideas and things that interest him.
But this "boy" thing is what I dreaded -- when laying on that table, belly exposed, and the doctor looked at the fuzzy black and white screen and announced "it's a boy!"
Boy? I don't know anything about boys!
But until now, it hasn't been so bad. I can throw a ball, and can hang out in forts and can even wrestle around on the ground. But that was KID stuff. This is BOY stuff. And no matter what I can "do," I'm not a boy. And so I don't fit in. And Dr. James Dobson, in "Bringing up Boys," says that this is a good thing. and necessary thing. He is a boy. And one day a man.
and I will forever be "mom." Unashamedly embracing, and embarrassing, mom.
2 comments:
Oh, Lynn. I am so not ready for that, either! And that was exactly the thought I had when they told me Cannon was a boy: I don't know anything about boys! For the record, my knowledge of you, and the glimpses I get of your mommy-life here, tell me that you are a fabulous mom of boys--now and in all the stages to come.
Lynn, you put your heart into words so nicely. You're not missing ANYthing - you are a very intentional mama who seeks wisdom in all areas of your most important job :)
I love you! And I will have many BOY questions for you when ours joins our family... :)
-Jen
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